It was interesting to read the blog for last year because there were a lot of things in it that I thought had happened at a different time, for instance, remember the french toast that Ellie announced we were bringing in Friday as she was going to bed Thursday night? That was early November. I would have guessed much later in the school year. I talk about a blood transfusion that got stopped because I had a fever. I really don't remember that at all. I was also surprised to read my detailed descriptions of the physical sensation of neutropenic fever, doing my Dartmouth benefits last year, turning the TV on at Dartmouth in my room to find out the election results, etc.. Gosh! I don't remember any of that.
I guess it makes sense because I was pretty sick and my brain probably had a hard time laying down memories when it was 102 degrees for days on end, to say nothing of being super stressed and having had a ton of toxins washed over and through it. I worry about what the longer term effects are to my cognition of what my brain went through with leukemia and, in particular, the chemo to get rid of it. People tell me they can't tell that I'm not as smart as before leukemia/chemo, but I can.
|New baby bamboo growing in my office. May my brain be sprouting new neuronal connections too.|
May all of our brains improve with time. May our memories of the past improve as time passes.