OK, so I'm a bad person. Dartmouth doesn't feel it's a violation for employees to look in their own charts, but I rarely do except through the official myDH website. Lots of other employers do feel that no one can look at their own chart, but not Dartmouth, thankfully. (In case you are wondering, they do feel it's a violation if I look in anyone else's chart who is not my patient.) I don't usually look in my chart because I think it's not very good form, but I made an exception tonight because I was very anxious, it's too late for anyone to call now and, as I've already mentioned, I'm a bad person. Anyway, the labs were normal. Like, totally normal. Dr. Hill has not called me with the official reading, but I did get my labs a day earlier than he was expecting because I was such a nervous wreck this time. There is always the slim possibility that he will tell me that I missed something, but it's not rocket science to look at a CBC with a long column of black numbers and call it normal. Especially since they make the abnormals red.
You may not remember the context of this set of labs, so let me tell the whole story. It goes back to January, when I had my second opinion visit with Dr. Stone. I then went back to Dr. Hill and we went over those results and the CT results and declared me done with treatment. But, wait! Just a minute. What do we have here? Abnormal labs? You can be "done with treatment," but cannot really close the book on "My Leukemia Treatment" because you still have abnormal labs. It took them this long to normalize, but finally. Finally. They are normal in every way. I can finally feel like I am done with my leukemia treatment. I think I will sleep well tonight.
I did not mention another milestone that happened today because it was swamped in the overall emotional content of the day. I did mention it to the people who were around at lunchtime, however. Today, for lunch I ate the thawed last remains of the last food that anyone cooked for me when I was in and out of the hospital this summer. It was delicious.
If I had known that all it took for my labs to normalize was to clean out the freezer, I would have done that months ago.